Emotional Intelligence
There are five core components of emotional intelligence
“Experience is not what happens to you — it’s how you interpret what happens to you.” Aldous Huxley
Every person has their own set of preferences, desires and needs. You all also have a variety of different ways of expressing yourself emotionally. To percieve, acknowledge, understand and relate to this vast array of difference requires a particular kind of intelligence if you are to progress in your life.
Emotional intelligence is the level to which you are able to be aware of, regulate, and express your emotions. It is also the extent to which you are able to navigate your way through interpersonal relationships and interactions progressively and with empathy for your fellow citizens. Having an enhanced emotional intelligence opens the door to both personal and professional success. So what are the 5 domains then and how can you improve your EQ?
1. Self-Awareness
The ability to perceive, understand acknowledge and accept yourself. It’s also about generating an understanding as to your impact on others and identifying your strengths and development areas. It includes:
a) Knowledge of self: Having an understanding of self, including physical & emotional state, values, beliefs, preferences and personality, and recognising their impact.
b) Realistic self-assessment: Accurately perceiving your strengths and development areas, your impact in interactions, and how your perceptions compare with the perspectives of others’.
c) Self-confidence: The degree to which you have a sense of your self-esteem, influence, skills and knowledge.
d) Emotional awareness: Perceiving and understanding the variety of different emotional states within and acknowledging when you are experiencing them.
2. Self-Regulation
The ability to regulate your emotions, manage your stress, control your impulses and remain productive, progressive and proactive. It includes:
a) Physical & Emotional self-control: Managing triggers and instinctive responses to limit negative or destructive impact on others or self.
b) Integrity: Being transparent; behaving in line with values and beliefs; taking personal responsibility for your behaviour and performance; promoting and maintaining trust.
c) Flexibility: Adapting to changing situations or overcoming obstacles. Flexing style and preferences when appropriate and being resilient where necessary. Embracing change and innovation, being creative and accepting difference.
e) Conscientiousness: going about your work professionally and thoroughly; being personally effective, organized and appropriate.
3. Self-Motivation
The ability to identify how to unlock potential, manage your will-power and remain optimistic when presented with challenge. It includes:
a) Will to succeed: Persevering to achieve excellence. Having the ability to set goals and reach them; to manage set-backs and keep on track.
b) Commitment: Being able to make commitments and follow through on them. Taking full responsibility for any outcomes. Continually working on self-development.
c) Taking the initiative: Ability and willingness to identify solutions and act on opportunities.
d) Optimism: Maintaining an ongoing positive outlook even when faced with adversity.
4. Empathy
The ability to visualise a variety of perspectives or put yourself in another person's shoes, without judging them as to whether they are right or wrong to feel the way they do. It includes:
a) Relating to others: Developing a sense of other peoples' needs, desires, preferences and personalities; being genuinely curious of and interested in others. Valuing all contributions, perceptions and experiences.
b) Connecting with others: Connecting with your own emotional experiences. Sharing the response and building emotional connection.
b) Compassion: Perceiving, anticipating and acknowledging the needs of others. Taking action to meet, solve or address these needs.
c) Organisational empathy: Relating to and generating an understanding of what influences the organisation, including leadership, vision, strategy, values, beliefs and external pressures.
5. Social Skills
The ability to manage healthy, progressive relationships. To assertively express your needs, emotions and desires with complete respect and consideration for the needs, emotions and desires of others.
a) Communication: Connecting effectively with others; being differentiated in interactions; influencing and persuading others with an appropriate and progressive approach.
b) Collaboration and Teamwork: Promoting synergy by working collectively. Creating and nurturing robust, collaborative relationships and networks.
c) Enabling others: Developing others' capabilities through progressive, empowering support. Facilitating disagreement progressively, enabling others to find solutions themselves.
d) Leadership: Establishing targets and strategies. Inspiring and motivating buy-in to the goals and vision of the organisation.
Emotional intelligence is now considered an absolute necessity for success in any organisation and at any stage in your career. So can anyone develop emotional intelligence?
Although your EQ levels are to some degree influenced by experience and upbringing, it is always possible to further develop emotional intelligence. If you are open to the idea of self improvement and have the will to change and grow, the benefits of enhancing your EQ mean for greater contentment, improved mental and physical health, more progressive relationships, and a significant lowering of stress and anxiety.
Some initial suggestions to help with developing your emotional intelligence:-
Self-awareness
Practice gauging how you feel
Notice how you behave at different times
Observe how others respond to you
Become aware of your triggers
Visualise how you might feel or respond
Encourage and invite feedback from others
Self-regulation
Eat well and get enough sleep
Create and maintain a schedule
Find an appropriate physical outlet
Take responsibility for how you feel
Remember to breath and choose your response
Review your opinions and be prepared to change them
Self-motivation
Regularly get out of your comfort zone
Explore and discover what motivates you
Set yourself appropriate and realistic goals
Practise positive thinking and re-framing
Celebrate your successes and learn from set-backs
Never stop exploring what drives you
Empathy
Make yourself approachable
Acknowledge others and their responses
Get a sense of others' perspectives
Resist and reserve judgement
Really listen and be genuinely interested
Open up emotionally yourself
Social skills
Make sure your words are aligned with your 'non-verbals'
Observe the greats and notice what they do
Engage brain before opening mouth
Make your interactions face-to-face
Practice on the population
Get into networking
Emotional intelligence for everyone
We are passionate about developing emotional intelligence in anyone and everyone, including ourselves. Each Avery Mind programme and all of the material we use is always framed within the 5 domains of emotional intelligence. Our aim is to help you develop the skills you need for a fulfilling and successful life.